Mother’s Day has come and gone, but there are some stepmothers who are still recovering from the aftermath.
What were your expectations for Mother’s Day? Did you expect your stepkids to make you breakfast in bed? Give you a card? Call and tell you how much they appreciate everything you do for them?
If you didn’t get so much as a nod in your direction, you’re just one of many stepmoms who were brought to tears this Mother’s Day.
Many stepmoms were devastated at the lack of acknowledgement by their stepchildren.
Stepmoms who are fed up with not being recognized by their stepchildren, their husband, or, God forbid, their stepchildren’s mother, for all their selfless actions.
For cleaning up after the kids, for shuttling them back and forth, for wiping their tears and sometimes their butts! For doing all of this while being treated like “the help.”
So how can you make next year better?
Here are 5 simple ways to make sure you don’t spend another Mother’s Day in tears :
- Celebrate with friends. Plan a day with your friends ahead of time. What’s better? Sitting at home crying that you’re not appreciated or being out with friends who remind you of how wonderful you are?
- Celebrate yourself! I’m convinced we don’t do this enough. Mother’s day is the perfect time to spoil yourself, so splurge on a spa day or just enjoy some YOU time. Read a book that you haven’t had time for, make a favorite meal and enjoy the quiet.
- Remember that they are KIDS. Understand that kids, by nature, are self-centered and usually need to be prompted to show appreciation for their own parents. Plus, they may feel guilty wanting to celebrate you, if they think it’s going to hurt their mom. If you’re lucky enough to be shown love by your stepkids outside of Mother’s Day, then acknowledge that and know their lack of, doesn’t mean they don’t love and appreciate you.
- Tell your husband how you expect to be acknowledged. Men love to provide for you, but they need to know what it is you want. And if you’re saying “he should know” or “the kids should know”, then you’re setting them up to fail and you up for disappointment. Spell it out for him. Tell him exactly how you’d like to spend Mother’s Day.
- Who needs Mother’s Day when there’s Stepmother’s Day! That’s right, there’s a day JUST FOR YOU! It’s the Sunday after Mother’s day. So there’s no competition involved. Just remember to see number 4 to make sure it’s a complete success!
That being said, Happy early Stepmother’s Day to all you wonderful stepmoms.
Thank you for doing one of the toughest jobs out there!
Have other suggestions? Share them here so your fellow stepmoms can benefit!
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© 2011 Jenna Korf All rights reserved
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(Photo credit: worradmu)